Bully for Long Beach

The front page story in today's Newsday is about the epidemic bullying in Long Island schools. It features four kids willing to speak on the record about their torment, and two of the four are from Long Beach High School. Reading it made me just want to cry.

I can easily imagine that for a teenager, being bullied at school could well be worse than being bullied at home. Teenagers identify more closely with their friends than with their families, and peer-rejection must be a pain that traumatizes a teen like no other. It is a kind of sociopathy that is unforgiveable, because it robs its victims of their last few years of childhood and scars them for life.

Each of the kids who spoke for the article alerted their schools to their problem, and despite the schools' policy-appropriate actions (detention for the bullies, workshops for the student bodies at large), the harrassment continues. The family of one of the kids decided to withdraw him from school altogether until they can move to another district. The two 10th graders from Long Beach are starting an anti-bullying club together. Good for them!  But in the meantime, the torture continues.

Who gives these torturers their power? Who allows them to perpetuate their singular cruelty?  We do. We tsk, tsk and applaud the schools for acknowledging the problem and their efforts to sensitize students and faculty to this insidious form of gang-war. What we don't do is demand drastic and immediate action.

The first line of defense for parents of kids being bullied is certainly to allow the educational system to exert its influence. But the kids profiled in Newsday describe literally years of abuse that the schools have been powerless to stop, despite their best efforts. It seems to me that families in this situation should be willing to endure ineffectiveness for only so long before taking matters into their own hands.

A formal police complaint would be one way to let the bully's parents know that you are not willing to watch your child suffer in silence.Civil action against the bully's family would be another way to get their attention, and potentially hit them where it hurts most -- in their checkbook. Criminal action would be entirely warranted, in my opinion, if only bullying were officially classified as a criminal act.

Since unfortunately it's not (yet), we are still reliant on the schools to put a stop to this wholly unacceptable behavior. Instead of ineffectual lectures from the dean, bullies should be segregated from the rest of the student population in class. Instead of after-school detention, they should be suspended. Bullies should not be permitted to circulate among our children, and as evidenced by the four brave students willing to share their stories in Newsday, drastic action is needed to turn the advancing tide before the land is flooded.

Home Sweet Home

San Francisco has hills you could ski down, mist-ical views of the Bay, and beautiful, quirky streetscapes populated by beautiful, quirky architecture. Long Beach has a magnificent boardwalk you can stroll, run or ride; world-class views of the Atlantic, and beautiful, eclectic streetscapes populated by beautiful, eclectic homes.

SF has great shopping, great eating and great access to the natural outdoors, just over the Golden Gate Bridge. LB has limited (but improving) shopping, mediocre eating, and the best natural playground on the East Coast, just up the block. No driving, no trudging uphill required. And we're a stone's throw from the best city on the planet.

San Fran has its charms (just got back, in case you can't tell. Birthday surprise for my sister - the look on her face was priceless!).  But Long Beach has magic.


I love them both, but LB is home.

Let's Play Ball!

There's been a lot of arguing lately about the proposed new sports complex at LB High. Last week, a fellow football parent asked us to sign a petition expressing support for the project, which we did and which was presented at a school board meeting overflowing with both opponents and advocates.

The project has polarized at least two camps: families of children who play sports (most of whom presumably do not live adjacent to the school) and channel-side Lido Beach homeowners. At a stop sign one morning after dropping my son off at Middle School for practice, I overheard two neighbors on the sidewalk complaining to each other about the traffic they expect  the complex to bring to the neighborhood. To which I say, true, but only on game days. And isn't that a small sacrifice for the betterment of the community as a whole? Why should LB kids be prevented from utilizing and enjoying the HS field that is presently so sub-standard that it can be used only for practice? Why should all of the district's students be permanently penalized (even on non-game days) to satiate the selfish motives of the handful of homeowners whose properties border the school grounds? And what did you expect when you bought your home on the periphery of the school field anyway? 

All I know is, last night we attended our first home football game at the new Middle School field and it was blissful sitting there in the sparkling stands, cheering on our boys (who BTW massacred the other team) and taking in the waterscape of the Lido Beach golf club behind the visitors' stand. It was fabulous to see the kids play on a clean, well marked, well lit field under a scoreboard that actually kept score!  I can only look forward to more of the same when my middle schooler starts playing for the HS team.  Let's hope the field gets built before he graduates in 2015.

Incidentally, the football parent circulating the petition in support of the field is that rare exception to the rule: a Lido homeowner willing to put the best interest of the kids ahead of his own.  We need more like him.

The Bad Old Days

Now that summer is over, my antennae seem to be taking a break. I'm not feeling as tuned in as usual to the detritus that detracts from our LB experience. With one notable exception that's been on my mind since I started walking the boardwalk again after my knee surgery... the Hoffman Manor. 

Has anyone else noticed the cluster of men who began congregating on the boardwalk in front of the Hoffman Manor last summer? It doesn't bode well for a city that has spent 30 years pulling itself out of the depression that characterized our metropolis in the 60s and 70s.  SROs, section 8 housing, nursing homes... does that sound familiar?

Most people will agree that the Hoffman Manor is a far cry from a "seashore resort" or a "luxury retirement community," which is how it bills itself. But until now, it has not been any of the antisocial iterations that once populated our boardwalk. In my observation, the new residents of Hoffman Manor so far appear to be well mannered. But something doesn't feel right. There's been a change, and I'm not sure it's for the better. I'll say this much...it better not signal a return to the bad old days in good old LB.

Singin' in the Rain

Could any true LBer possibly ask for a better weather pattern?  Hot, sunny and gaw-geous all summer, then M-F rain in the fall with dry weekends.  Who could ask for anything more?

Wrong Way Street

We live on a one-way, east-west corridor. Theoretically, that should make traffic a little less treacherous than on a two-way thoroughfare. But the theory goes out the window every time a north-south driver turns onto  our block the wrong way, which happens more frequently than you might think... and not only after the West End lets out for the evening (or should I say, morning?) on Fridays and Saturdays. I can't even tell you how many times my husband has chased a wrong-way driver literally up the middle of the road to set him/her straight. 

When the kids on the block were little, we all chipped in for those neon plastic figurines that you put out on the curb to warn drivers about children playing. These little guys became something of a theme for our block, and one neighbor family even came dressed as the neons one year at a Halloween party (hint: spray paint your disposable hazmat suit). Unfortunately, our neons had a short lifespan, as they were soon stolen.

If these temporary warning posts didn't do the trick, a more permanent solution might. Our standard-issue "one way" intersection signs should have a "wrong way" plaque posted underneath, like the more fortunate corner Cupcake and I routinely pass during our neighborhood constitutional. Dollars to donuts that the people on that street have far fewer wrong-wayers barreling down their block than we do.

For another thing, drivers should simply slow down, look both ways and read the subtle signals, even if they can't read the signs. If the parked cars are all pointed in the same direction on both sides of the street, IT IS A CLUE that traffic only goes one way. If you can't figure that much out, you should be sleeping it off safely at home, not operating a motor vehicle.

And, for the record, if you suddenly discover that you're headed the wrong way down a one way street, do us all a favor: stop, pull into the next driveway, and turn around!

Dog Days of LB

I love my dog. She is an itchy, allergy-ridden, balding mutt; she barks at strangers and sometimes has accidents in the house. But I love her love her love her and she loves me back. I also love other people's dogs. My across-the-street neighbor has a Brittany Spaniel that hugs (awww). My next door neighbor has a magnificent German Shepherd that could represent the species.The people on the corner have a gi-normous Great Dane that makes me go ga-ga (she's white and pink like my Cupcake.Yes, pink). But you know who doesn't love dogs?  The City of Long Beach.



Yep. Long Beach is an anti-dog town. No dog runs. No dog parks. No dogs on the beach. No place to let your canine off the leash and just let loose, like dogs are meant to do. Fortunately, we have a backyard just big enough for Cupcake to exercise herself chasing airplanes and squirrels, but not everyone is that lucky.

A few years ago I got together with a bunch of other people to petition the city to establish a dog run. At this point I don't remember who they were or how we connected, but we shared a noble goal. We drew up a proposal for establishing, maintaining and policing a dog run in Long Beach, and we presented it at a City Council meeting. We even included a recommendation for charging a user registration fee to fund the run, but to no avail. I have no memory of what happened after that, because in fact nothing happened. When our 3 minutes of fame were up, the Council went back to its regularly scheduled agenda without further ado. And that was that.

Wouldn't it be great if we had a place to call our own, where dogs could frolic and owners could socialize and the friendly, lovin'-life culture of Long Beach could percolate? Sigh. I don't know if it will ever happen, but a girl can dream, can't she?

BTW, if all the dog owners out there who don't respect other people's property and don't clean up after their dogs would start respecting other people's property and cleaning up after their dogs, we might have a better shot at getting a public dog run one day.  You know who you are.

Sidewalk Splendor

Many of the businesses on Park Avenue do a great job of maintaining the sidewalks in front of their establishments. Quite a few of them keep planters on the street to dress things up. Unfortunately, not everyone follows their lead. Nu-Clear Cleaners, in particular, is an affront to all who enter Long Beach through our main north-south artery. They operate a virtual billboard of advertisements that dominates the corner of our largest and busiest intersection, with nary a tree or flower in site.Welcome to town! Let us box store your winter quilt! 

Nu-clear Cleaners need only look across the street to Pier One or the Mobil station for examples of how to do it right. Both of those businesses do an excellent job of maintaining an appealing facade that contributes to Long Beach's image as the thriving community that it is, without detracting in any way from their visibility or accessibility to customers. The Long Beach movie theater, too, is a model Nu-clear would do well to emulate.


I can't claim personal knowledge of the city code that governs maintenance of the streetscape in Long Beach.  But it would be a great thing if we undertook to extend the tree lined curbs such as between Edwards and National Blvds. to the east and west limits of town. And it would be wonderful as well to enforce an ordinance prohibiting storefronts from using their windows as billboards.

Nu-clear Cleaners, it's time to clean up your act.

Comin' Up Roses

One of the things I love best about Long Beach is the landscaping on the center medians along Park Avenue. It was one of the first things I noticed when we first arrived in LB 21 years ago. We came here from Brighton Beach in Brooklyn (once beach people, always beach people - we met on Fire Island), so you get the picture. My regular route home from the city back then was the Gowanus Expressway, perhaps the ugliest, filthiest road in North America (followed closely by the Van Wyck). When we moved to Long Beach, I began traveling the Loop Parkway to my new office in Woodbury, and I remember, like it was yesterday, driving home on the Loop, heading into the sunset and listening to Springstein on the radio, thinking: this is why we moved here.

That's how the landscaping on Park Avenue makes me feel. It just makes me happy that we all think it's important enough to preserve the line item in the city budget in order to beautify our community. It just makes me smile every time I see it. It sure beats hell out of the Gowanus!

Trashing the Beach

Problem:
Trash on the beach is an affront to everything that makes Long Beach Long Beach. So today, when three guests of the Allegria Hotel left their valet-assembled chaise lounges and headed back to their rooms, I called the concierge desk to complain about the newspapers, water bottles and other refuse they left behind on the sand. It took only a minute for two hotel staffers to head down to survey the damage, but instead of cleaning up, they about-faced and left the mess to bob on the incoming tide.

Solution:
Along with beach towels, sun shades and umbrellas, the Allegria should provide trash bags, or even designer receptacles, to make sure that their guests leave our beach in the same condition in which they find it.  And they should train their beach staff in the common courtesies that will enable the hotel to thrive as a welcome and valued member of the community.